Wildstorm~Wolfclan

[Wildstorm]

Name :Wildstorm

Gender:Female

Rank (if there is one):Alpha female

Appearance :Wildstorm is a very Strong female and you can see her muscles though her fur.Wildstorm is a white wolf with a bit of grey at the tip of her tail and ears.She has gold eyes but upon closer examination, one would notice that there is a bit of dark blue.Wildstorm is quite large for a female and she is pretty skinny but not enough to see her ribs.Wildstorm has long sharp fangs and she has a long tail.Wildstorm has middle size paws.Wildstorm has long legs so she runs really fast.

History :Wildstorm's mom was ran over by a truck and when Wildstorm went to see her mother the humans got out and took her.Her dad was shot trying to save Wildstorm by hiding her and not himself.Wildstorm lived by herself she didn't like having friends till she met a handsome male wolf and they joined a wolf pack.Wildstorm never thought she would join another wolf pack when her family died.She was born a only wolf so she only played with her mom and dad and as soon as they died she was all alone except for her one friend Clawpelt.

Personality :Wildstorm doesn't like to make friends but if you get to be friends with her you are lucky.Wildstorm is a out-going kind of wolf,who enjoys playing alot.She can be very grumpy sometimes but that can all go away if someone treats here kindly.Wildstorm won't take any dis respect from anyone and if you do disrespect her you better watch out.Wildstorm loves watching the lake and how it all flows.She wants to be a mother some day but needs to find the prefect male wolf.Wildstorm loves eating rabbit.

Role Play Example :Wildstorm ran though the woods till she came to a huge lake she went to take a drink when her friend pushed her in.The water was warm and deep but Wildstorm could swim so she didn't worry.Wildstorm laughed and pulled her friend in with her.Then all of a sudden Wildstorm heard a big bang and then a yelp from her mom.She jumped out and ran to her mom.Her mom had a tire mark on her belly and blood was coming out of the huge cut.Wildstorm tried to get to her mom but humans came and took her.Wildstorm gave a painful howl so all the other wolfs know that someone died.

Password (from plot) :
Picture:

[Dorynator]

Okay, a few things:
add a couple more lines to all of them.

In appearance, muscles isn't spelt mussels. Its muscles.
Now I noticed you use 'you' a lot in there. eg. you like closer you can see abit of dark blue. Try not to use that, change it to something like: but upon closer examination, one would notice that there is a bit of dark blue.
Again go into more detail with all of the thingys; we want around 10 lines for each of them.
Wildstorm lived by herself she didn't like having friends till she met a handsome male and they joined a wolf pack.
Now I don't think there is anything grammatically wrong with that sentence, it just sounds a little....iffy. To me. You might wanna go over that. Add more lines to history.
Wildstorm is a out-going kind of with and she plays alot
Wildstorm is an out-going kind of wolf, who enjoys playing alot. Again, just makes it seem...better...
Wildstorm ran though the woods till she came to a huge lake. She went to take a drink when her friend pushed her in(describe the water here. Something like: into the freezing water. Just little things like that.)
Wildstorm laughed the pulled her friend in with her..
The pulled? No, you mean: Wildstorm laughed and pulled her friend in with her.
Her mom had a tire mark on her belly and blood was coming out.
Coming out of what? Try something like: Her mom had a tire mark on her belly and blood was coming out of a cut down her side.
okay, thats all I could see. Remember, we want around te lines for each section. Nice try though ;D

[Wildstorm]

I fixed it

[Dorynator]

'Kay. All mistakes are minor. I'll PM wild to see if its fine for you to be Alpha. But otherwise, its good.

[Whiteclaw]

ok

[Dorynator]

Kay, as A global moderator on this great site of Call to the Wild (do you hear it?), I herby decree you as.... ah, stuff it, Accepted as Alpha female of WolfClan

[Wildstorm]

Yay